SSC,RACK, shit happens.

I wrote a post about this in the past, that went on forever. With all I wrote about I still never got to the heart of the matter because I was too busy trying to cover all bases. Trying to make sure that every kinky person who read it would have their warnings and what not so as not to offend them. Well, Shit happens, if you find this to be so against what you think, I can solve that for you. SHIT HAPPENS, get over it. Stop reading now!! I really don’t want you to pop the blood vessels in your eyes if you can’t handle someone having their own opinion.

These are just my ever evolving opinions on subjects that I find the need to keep thinking about until I can come up with an acceptable answer for myself. Not for you sitting at your computer desk reading this, but for me, my self and fucking I. I have this urge to keep revisiting areas until I am sure I have come to the best fit for me. Does that mean you can use this to help yourself? Sure. Don’t take my word as gold, what works for me, doesn’t work for everyone else.

I want to make a quick pit stop at SSC and why it bothers me so damn much. I could never really put into words why until recently. When I met a newbie and got to remembering what it was like to be new to the kink world. I’ve never really forgotten cause I still consider myself a newbie, but I have a little background in different areas. First thing that bugs me about the terms is the terms themselves and how they are used. I spent time retyping and going over what the terms Safe and Sane meant, in general. Here’s what I got:
“Safe
Adjective
1.secure from liability to harm, injury, danger, or risk. A safe place.
2. Free from hurt, injury, danger, or risk; to arrive safe and sound.
3. Involving little or no risk of mishap, error, ect. A safe estimate.
4. Dependable or trustworthy: a safe guide.
5.Careful to avoid danger or controversy: a safe player; a safe play.
6. Denied the chance to do harm; in secure custody: a criminal safe in jail.”
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/safe

“Sane:
Adjective
1. Free from mental derangement; having a sound, healthy mind: a sane person.
2. Having or showing reason, sound judgment, or good sense: sane advice.
3. Sound; healthy.”
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sane

We can say sure what we do is SSC by our standards. But lets really ask ourselves is it sane to do what we do at all? By the standards of the general public that would be a big no. This is one reason I have to laugh at those people sitting in the camp of “my kink is better then your kink.” If that camp works good for you, more power to you. It doesn’t work for me. How can we point at someone doing “edge play” and say “that’s not safe or sane, you shouldn’t do it!” To me that is the pot calling the kettle black.

The next point that really makes me not like SSC comes from my past and the people I’ve played with in the past as well as people I see/hear about in passing. These people that chant SSC are the biggest lairs of them all in my opinion. Like chanting SSC is really going to make tying someone up, flogging them, and fucking them any more safer then what it is already. It’s like some people out there, I’ll call them vultures to denote the difference, are going round spinning stories to newbies about SSC. It’s one of their tools to get this newbie to play with them. “Oh, I ONLY do things that are SSC, and you should trust me because I follow SSC to the letter, I would never ever do RACK or anything else because that is TOO dangerous and I would never ever hurt you.” The vultures who use this line are full of shit. But it works for them because the rest of the community doesn’t want to look bad legally so we go rounds say yes what we do is SSC, Yes you should only follow SSC. Yes lets set you up to play with someone who is just using SSC as a cover to take advantage of the situation and phrase.

RACK, I can agree with and for the most part am in favor of just because as I see it most everything is covered. Sure, I am aware of the downsides of this term/idea. But at least it’s more honest. Within the community, while talking to people of the community I think it’s should be RACK. If we have to talk to a vanilla or in a court maybe we can push SSC past them like we do the newbies. But every lawyer out there is going to say really? Hanging someone upside down and having them suck your cock/eat your pussy? That’s sane? Are you fucking shitting me?

When It comes to me, I know the risks that my play involves, as well as the risks other forms of play involve that I don’t do. Why? Cause I’m a nebshit and I like to learn about as much as I can on different topics. But I also know that I am not a god. I cannot control, nor can any other human out there control everything. Yes we get off to giving up control, getting control, or both. But we cannot see accidents coming, from equipment failing to slip ups in play. That factor is always going to be there. I call that part of play “shit happens.” Anything can happen, accepting that and going forward is how I play.

If I don’t admit that I know something “could” happen to me, then I’m just being foolish. That’s how I see it. Accepting that hey I do some pretty insane shit, edge play or whatever you want to call it. But there has always been a part of it that was RACK and a part that was giving up control to the universe of, hell, shit happens.

One last quick note before I go take a nap or something. I’d like to thank a few people for helping me figure out how I wanted to say all this. They didn’t say things the way I did, but they did tell me how they felt on this area and helped shaped my own opinions. Thanks Kuve, Dov, B.Playful, and others out there who have talked and shared their opinions with me.

~Raven~